Living in this somewhat dire situation, I wonder sometimes how I do it.
Each day I meet someone new who shares with me the challenges their facing. And I wonder what’s going on. Why is Washington always saying the economies growing and things are looking good. When all I see is challenge after challenge.
Now I know there are two classes upper and lower and the middle is getting lost. Way lost on the totem pole. I know this because it’s me getting lost among others. And I’m not sure how I’m going to get back.
Each day I wake up with anxiety and go to bed with the same anxiety. My shrink has prescribed a tranquilizer but it was causing side effects. So I have to wait to see her in two weeks to get a new one. There are days I just take my evening med just during the day and that helps a little. But it’s not suppose to be taken that way. I’ve reach out to so many as I can and I feel I just have to let the chips fall, just let it all crumble. It saddens me that I’ve come to that point. I’ve exhausted all options!
I thought I’d learned a lesson, but I guess I didn’t. So I guess a third times a charm. I don’t want have to change numbers, but when the calls start coming in it will be exhausting not answering these calls. I’m scared because I’ve been thru this all before and it’s all so difficult. I just don’t have anyone to rely on to hear me. This feeling is horrible and weakening. But I guess I must go thru it, I have no choice. I have no choice……!