Why do I dislike holiday weekends?

My anger today is heightened to a level of panic. Don’t know why, maybe because I hate holiday weekends. They tend to make me feel so lonely. Not that there aren’t people to see, there are, it’s been this way ever since I was young. If we’d stay home my parents usually fought about something. My brother and I usually fought also. My grandparents and maybe my Aunt Marge and Uncle Mike would come by for a barbecue. But I always felt disconnected. And when I sat around with them there was always loud voices. Were Italian what can I say.

Even when we would go away I felt the same way because they acted similar to how they acted at home. Don’t get me wrong it’s not about them, it’s all about why I felt this way. To this day never quite figured out why.

I’m looking forward to Tuesday.

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